Wealth File #10 – Be An Excellent Receiver
Rich people “are excellent receivers.”
Poor people “are poor receivers.”
If I had to choose the primary reason why most people do not reach their full financial potential, it would be that most people are poor “receivers.” They are either good or not good at giving, but they are definitely bad at receiving. And because of that, they don’t receive.
People see receiving as a challenge because of a lot of reasons. First, most people feel that they are not worthy or do not deserve to receive. This condition is widespread in our society. I would estimate that approximately 90 percent of people feel that they are not good enough.
Where does this low confidence come from? Usually, it is from our conditioning. For most of us it comes from hearing twenty No’s for every yes, ten “You’re doing it wrong”s for every “You’re doing it right,” and five “You’re stupid”s for every “You’re awesome.”
Even if our parents were very supportive, still many of us end up feeling that we do not deserve their praises and that we have not met their expectations. Therefore, we’re still not good enough.
Also, a lot of us grew up knowing that if we do something wrong, punishment will follow. Although this is an unwritten rule, it has been part of our lives.
Some have been taking punishment from our parents, some from our teachers, and some are threatened in religious circles with the worst punishment of all, that they will not be going to heaven.
Of course, now that we’re adults, one would think that this is all over. Right?
Unfortunately, it’s not! Most people strongly believe in the conditioning of punishment so much that even if there’s no one around to punish them, every time they make a mistake, they punish themselves without noticing it. During their younger years, this punishment might have come in the form of “You were bad, so no candy.” But, today, it could come in the form of “You were bad, so no money.” This is one reason why some people limit their earnings, and why others will subconsciously sabotage their success.
No wonder people have difficulty receiving. One wrong move and you’re fated to be unhappy and poor for the rest of your life. “A little harsh,” you say? Since when did the mind become rational and sympathetic? Again, the mind is a folder filled with files from past, made-up meanings, and stories of drama and disaster. “Making sense” is not its strong suit.
Here’s something I share in my seminars that might make you feel better. In the end, it doesn’t matter if you feel worthy or not, you can be rich either way. Some of the rich people don’t feel exceptionally worthy either. It is even one of the main motivations for people to get rich… to prove themselves and their worth to themselves and to others. That self worth is necessary for net worth is only an idea, which doesn’t hold water in the real world. As we stated earlier, getting rich to prove yourself might not make you happy, so it is better for you to create wealth for other reasons.
But, what’s important is that you understand your feelings of unworthiness and that it won’t stop you from getting rich. From a financial point of view, this could even become a motivational asset.
Source: Secrets of the Millionaire Mind, T. Harv Eker © 2003